Posts Tagged ‘self care’

Want to slow down your ageing process?
Me too, I can’t possibly fit in everything I want to do in 40 or so years.

Alas, I have a plan and I’m happy to report it’s working!

It’s a simple thing really, nothing miraculous or new.
I’m not a modern genius with a grand discovery nor am I going to tell you about some magic pill, cream or tonic.

It’s all about how you live each day.
It’s all about exercising regularly, eating nutritiously, getting enough sleep, thinking good things, drinking water, being grateful, being generous, being kind, being tolerant, seeking the good, connecting with people, making an effort, having a ball, accepting hardship, asking for a hug, learning new stuff, truly relaxing and loving thyself  – wholeheartedly. 

Now, I appreciate that you have probably read or heard this before but are you actually doing any of it?

Knowing this stuff will not help you one iota my friend.
The proof and indeed the reward is in the doing.

That’s what my job is all about.
Helping people to do what they know they need to do.
On a deeper level my job is to move them from a ’should’ mind set to a ‘want‘ mind set – permanently. 

Your job is merely to know where your mind is set and if it needs shifting do something about that.
Support is always a good idea if you’re track record at behavioural change is poor. 
Health Coaching with Jo Woods is always an option!

The Nutshell:
Slowing down the ageing process requires self care on all levels.
This doesn’t mean you need to have less fun, on the contrary, you’ll most likely have more because you’ll feel better, happier – more youthful. 

Carpe diem!

If you’re a procrastinator, a worrier, a put-it-off-er-er, a lazy bones, a maybe-it’ll-just happen type of person then from time to time you probably need a jolly good kick in the pants and the best person to do that is YOU!

Here, let me help.
I say that because in a round about sort of way this is my job – teaching you how to kick yourself in the pants – it’s called self care.
My job is to help you see that you have what it takes to face the music and rise to the challenge AND what’s more that THE EFFORT WILL PRODUCE GREAT OUTCOMES .

When you make that phone call or do that task you’ll feel more confident.
When you choose not to feed your anxieties with choccy, chips, cheese or plonk you’ll feel stronger.
When you air your concerns you’ll feel lighter.
When you prioritise your exercise you’ll feel capable and clear.

THE NUTSHELL:
When you put your health & well-being first you’ll have the ability to hold the course to your dreams because self care IS believing in them.

Give yourself a kick in the pants today OR book in with me and I’ll do it for you – ever so gently of course!

I’m 41 and a half which I reckon is pretty young (it’s less than half my life) and although I am a fully fledged adult with big responsibilities I’m still growing up. 

I still have lots to learn and I welcome every lesson that comes my way.
I still have lots to do and I know I can make it all happen with the right attitude.
I still have lots of people to meet and lots of friendships to nurture and I know there’s time for all of them.
However, I still feel childlike sometimes and think about running away, throwing a wobbly or sooking with my mum.
Thankfully I’ve learnt how to meet my own needs and although sometimes I’m tempted to fall in a heap in the hope that someone will ‘rescue me’ I manage to keep it together.  
I look after myself, in every way.

Growing up gracefully is all about self care.

If you can learn to listen to and meet your own needs you’ll be less likely to throw a tantrum, yell abuse or storm out when things don’t go your own way.  
You’ll be able to take a breath and some time to think about what is actually happening - not just what is happening for you.
It’s the ability to look at the bigger picture and put things in perspective (see yesterdays post).
It’s the ability to check your expectations, apply tolerance and compassion and to sometimes just say – “oh well, things don’t always work out the way I thought they would”.

Self care doesn’t mean being an island though, it means being able to ask someone you trust for help when you need it. 

I’m here.

I love that song - Single Ladies by Beyonce.  ”if you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it”
It’s all about committment and I’m all for committment, especially in relation to health.
Here’s a different spin on Beyonce’s hit for you which I hope will lead you to think about committing to your health.

“Putting a ring on it“ in this context means committing to self care.
If you like yourself then you’d better commit to yourself. (and seriously, if you don’t like yourself then you’d better email me and we’ll get that sorted)

Committing to yourself means caring for yourself.  

On a daily basis self care means ‘keeping your mind on the mantra – exercise, eat well and think good things.
It also means brushing your teeth, managing your stress, getting enough sleep and making time to ‘play’.

On a more long term basis it means going to the dentist twice a year, having a health check once a year and booking in for any ‘age appropriate’ health checks as you reach each milestone. 
It also means making time for holidays – with and without the kids.
It means you need to commit to addressing the issues that are limiting you in any way so that you continue to move forward in all aspects of your life.
It also means accepting that everyone has flaws and that tolerance and compassion are essential to maintaining relationships.

Committing to yourself means committing to smiling more inside and out so please, show yourself the love and put a ring on it!

To keep your mind smiling you need to keep exploring.
To keep your mind exploring you need to keep yourself physically well.
To keep yourself physically well you need a mind which highly values self care.
Self care = self esteem and and vice versa. This provides the self confidence required to ’explore’.  

Self Care for the Mind:
Read widely. Books (fiction & non), mags, journals, reports, comics, blogs. Read something everyday. 
Watch a variety of TV shows, docos, movies.
Talk to all sorts of wierd and wonderful people. Appreciate their differences.
Do a course, study something. Keep learning and providing your brain with new information to sort through. 
Take time out every week to reflect. Learn from your mistakes, be grateful for all you have and stay focused on what you’re working towards.
Take time out every week just to think. Explore your ideas and the ideas of others, it will enliven you.
Manage your worries by talking to your ’confidant’ – a stable friend/family member, counsellor, therapist. It’s often better to lean on an indepnadant mentor who is not involved in your life and therefore has no particular investment in any particular outcome.   
Be open to the diversity life offers and be mindful of the fact that it would be remarkably dull without it. 

Self care for the body. 
Make exercise a part of your day. It’s essential NOT optional.
Do a variety of exercises which keep your body strong and flexible as well as ones which keep your heart and lungs healthy.
Eat well everyday. Eat appropriately portioned nutritional foods MOST of the time.
Sleep. Don’t underestimate the importance of sleeping well, it restores and rejuvenates your entire being.
Hydrate. Drinks lots of water everyday. 
Touch. Enjoy a big warm hug or have a massage. Your mind will benefit immensely from it.

Explore and smile.
It’s a wonderful life we have here, you gotta love it warts and all!

 
Who doesn’t like being touched?

I LOVE it and firmly believe that it is a a vital part of health management. 
During my 6 years of singledom I made sure that I had a massage at least once a fortnight just to meet that need and I encourage all single people to do the same.

When you’re in a relationship skin on skin is more accessible however I appreciate that as time goes on and life gets busier the skin on skin time tends to get put on the back burner. My counsel to you is to see it as a priority, something that will enhance your energy and well-being not to mention fueling your relationship.  

Take Home Message:Whether you are in a relationship or single you need and deserve physical affection. Make it happen.

Sometimes when people come to see me for Smiler Sessions (health & happiness mentoring/life coaching/rocket under arse kind of stuff) they spill the beans about their lifestyle and then burst in to tears. It’s a common occurrence and it’s because they are sad and mad at themselves for getting in to the state they’re in.  I usually shed a tear too then we get on with making things better and I always start with this: be your best friend.

We all want best friends who will keep us on the straight and narrow, who will guide us through tricky sitautions and tell us that we don’t need that second piece of cake/bottle of wine. This is fine but they are  not with us all the time plus it’s really not their job to keep our behaviour, habits and morals in check, it’s ours. After all, they too have issues to address and monitor.

We all need to be our own best friend first and treat ourselves with love and respect everyday.

We need to be the one to nurture our health.

We need to be the one to encourage us to stay on course with our visions.

We need to be the one to pull us up if we say something unpleasant and to congratulate us when we achieve something, small or big.

We need to be proud of everything we do, including the lessons we learn when we make mistakes.

We need to be the one who is responsible for meeting our needs on every level – even if that means asking for help.

Life is unpredictable. It is amazing and challenging and to live it with gusto you (and me and everyone in the world) require the unwavering support of someone and I believe you are the best person to rely on in this regard.  I’m not saying that you’re best friend/spouse can’t be there for you, of course they can and how wonderful it is to have them, what I am saying is that they can’t be everywhere all the time for you – it’s just not realistic OR fair.

You are only person who can ensure all your needs are met, no one else can do that for you so take the lead today and book a 90 minute massage (or tropical island holiday) because that’s what any ‘best friend’ would do for you right!!?

Enjoy!  

Smiler  x

Who’s looking after you my friend?
You I hope.
I hope you are looking after yourself because it is your responsibility.

It’s up to you to make sure you exercise regularly. Yes, I know your spouse never gets home in time and/or your job keeps sabotaging your ‘me time’ but it doesn’t make it their fault that you’re not active. Get committed. Where there’s a will…

It’s up to you to make sure you eat well. Yes, I know time is tight and there are tempting and convenient fast food options everywhere but is that really going to provide you with the energy and stamina you need to complete your ‘to do list’ each day? Get organised in the morning and fill a cool pack with all the food you need for the day. It will save you hundreds of dollars and tens of thousands of calories!

It is only you who can think good things about yourself and your life. It’s up to you to turn a negative in to a positive, to find opportunity in adveristy, to seek the good in everyone and to take steps to reach your pot of gold. Be proactive not reactive.

In a nutshell: Exercise, eat well, think good things – the mantra of self care. Live by it daily and you’ll always be smiling.