Posts Tagged ‘positive thinking’

Are you thinking you could or are you thinking you will?
Are you thinking I can’t or are you thinking I can?
Are you thinking it’s a long shot or are you thinking it’s within reach?
Are you thinking it won’t work or are you thinking it will?
Are you thinking the answer will be no or are you thinking it will be yes?
Are you thinking you the worst or are you thinking you the best?
Are you thinking failure or are you thinking success?

Are you thinking good things?

If not, I highly recommend you do because you’ll be more likely to achieve outcomes you’re wanting and you’ll enjoy the process of getting there so much more too.

Need a ‘postivity make-over’?
Check out the book called ‘Positivity’ in the ‘Smiler’s Amazon carousel – it will help OR I can !

One of the best ways to cultivate happiness is to ‘think good things’ about yourself and your life. I’m a devoted practitioner of ‘daily reflection time’ and am proud to say that the end of every day I always identify ‘my top 3 smilers’ (3 things that made me smile that day) then at the end of every week I do a summary of them all. It takes no more than a couple of minutes but the boost it gives me lasts for ages. I either do it while I’m driving, when I’m in the shower or when I’m cosily tucked in to bed at night. I can’t recommend it enough.

Please don’t get the wrong impression of me, I’m not in ‘happiness la-la land’ – I have my share of challenges to face but I’m able to face them with courage and confidence knowing that there is also plenty of good in my life.

Here are my top 5 smilers for this week.

1. Snorkling with Bobby and our kids. (family time)
This was a hugely rewarding experience for me. After 6 years as a single parent it was wonderful to do something ‘as a family’ (albeit a blended one)

2. Feedback from my appearance on A Current Affair (professional acknowledgement)
I received so many phone calls, emails and messages from people who had either watched or heard about my Pantry make-over segment on A Current Affair last week. It was wonderful. Thanks to everyone who got in touch to congratulate, encourage and praise me for my first television appearance.

3. ‘Health Coaching’ enquiry from Urban Smiler  (business)
I’ve only had my ‘Health Coaching’ page up on this site for a couple of months and this week I received my very first enquiry from it. I’d love to receive more so please, spread the word!     

4. Dinner at the Point Leo Boat Club (social/community connection)
After a perfect day on the beach we (Bobby, kids, family & friends) wandered up to the club house and threw together a delicious BBQ dinner. Social and relaxing, it was an ideal end to the day. 

5. 2009 Reflection (self care)
I spent time in the bath this week just reflecting back on 2009 and I concluded that overall I had a a sensational year. I achieved most of the things I set out to achieve and I fell in love. What more?

What would your top 5 smilers be for this week?

Every day you have thousands and thousands of thoughts and every one of those thoughts has an affect on your feelings and behaviour at some level.  I feel confident in assuming that, like millions of other people, a lot of the thoughts floating around your head are ‘negative’. Negative thoughts are extremely unhelpful because they don’t make you feel good about yourself, they don’t inspire you to takes steps towards your goals and dreams and they don’t  foster respectful loving relationships in your life. They’re just plain trouble.

Point: Every unhelpful thought can be swapped with a helpful thought.

Positive thoughts, on the other hand are helpful. They are the thoughts which boost your self esteem, energy and drive. They’re the ones which keep you connected to and moving towards your visions for the future. And they’re the thoughts which help you manage your health and your relationships with compassion and respect. They make you smile more, inside and out!

Nutshell: Take the time, make the effort, do the work – swap your unhelpful thoughts for helpful ones and smile more.

…KEEP YOUR MIND ON THE MANTRA:

Exercise, Eat Well & Think Good Things

Living by this mantra will ensure that you keep smiling inside and out which means you’ll always be making good decisions which means you’ll be taking steps towards your goals and dreams.

It’s all about self care. 
Self care fosters positive body image, confidence and high self esteem. When you feel good about yourself you make good decisions about all aspects of life.
Self care is also great role modelling for your kids, staff, partners and anyone else you would like to have a positive influence on.

In a nutshell: Self care gives you the energy required (mentally, physically & emotionally) to live the life you want to live so KEEP YOUR MIND ON THE MANTRA and smile more!

PS. I’m on ‘A Current Affair’ tonight – doing a ‘Pantry make-over’. It’s on channel 9 at 6.30pm.  Click here to view the ‘Pantry List’ I used for the segment.    

First things first. In a nutshell, your ‘frowner’ is the negative side of you and your ’smiler’ is the positive side.

In the field of psychology these parts of your psyche are sometimes referred to as weak self/strong self or lower self/ higher self and there are other similar terms but because I like to keep things simple and to a certain extent, ‘visual’, I use frowner & smiler.

Your frowner is the side that doubts, criticizes, blames & whinges. It finds flaws in everything and everyone, is self-defeating and intolerant. It is certainly not the side you want dominating your thoughts. Unfortunately though, the frowner dominates the minds of lots of people which makes life for them and for those around them quite challenging. The really super-duper good news is that no one is stuck being a frowner, it is completely ‘transformable’!

Your smiler on the other hand, is the side that trusts, praises, accepts and gives thanks. It looks for the good in people and situations and is most definitely the side you want in charge of your thoughts. It is not however, bullet-proof,  it can easily be eroded by difficult times and other ‘frowners’ so you do have to keep buffing it. The super-duper good news is that if you’re predominately a smiler you will register the beginnings of erosion very early and you’ll know what to do to prevent it from setting in.

I haven’t come accros a smiler yet who does not occasionally get affected by their frowner, myself included. It requries effort to keep your smiler in charge AND it also requires effort to prevent your frowner from taking charge so now that you know that effort is required either way the only question you have to answer is which side are you going to put effort in to? 

Another no brainer.

May the smiler be with you!

One of the ways I stay happy is to take a moment at the end of each day to think about the things that made me smile, then at the end of each week, no matter how challenging it has been, I have plenty of goodness to draw on. Here is my list for this week:- 

1. Pippa made her debut on stage and nailed it! (a parenting reward)
My 6.5 year old was put on the spot at school assembly on Tuesday when the principal asked her to come up and remind all the students about wearing their hats at play time. She confidently strode up, took the microphone and announced the importance of hat wearing now that spring is here. Talk about PROUD! I could not have had a wider smile.

2. A Meeting With Dr Happy (work stimulation)
On Tuesday evening I met up with Dr Tim Sharp (a.k.a Dr Happy http://www.drhappy.com.au/) to talk bout the possibility of us collaborating together at some stage – ‘Urban Smiler’ and ‘Dr Happy’ – c’mon, imagine the possible outcomes! We also talked a lot about Positive Psychology, an area to which he is a world leader in and to which I want to become experienced in.  It was a very stimulating meeting with a super smart, super happy man.

3. The Festival of The Big 4-oh! (community involvement)
This month at my workout studio (www.urbanworkout.com.au) we’re celebrating ‘The Festival of The Big 4-oh!’ which is all about focussing on the positives of being over 40. We’ve been handing out balloons, chocolate cake and t-shirts to people all around our community and the response has been wonderful. Of course we hope our efforts will result in us gaining a few new members but to be honest that will just be a bonus because the reward is definitely in observing the smiles we’re generating. I’m 41 and I’m happy as a lark and can sense that things are only going to get better and better – life certainly does begin in your forties!  

4. Sore muscles and a good belly laugh (self care)
I’ve been cruising with my exercise routine over the past couple of months which is absolutely fine becasue I’ve still been consistent and I’m a true believer in ’something is always better than nothing’, however I decided I needed a change of pace this week and boy am I feeling it. I never knew getting out of bed could be so challenging, I felt so silly trying that it made me laugh which made my abdominals hurt so much which made me laugh more and then I couldn’t stop. It’s eased off today and I feel fantastic but I think I’ll just go back to ‘cruise mode’ for a couple of days so I can get out of bed without wincing. 

5. A kid free night (quality relationship time)
Tonight Pippa is staying with her aunt & uncle so Bobby and I can go out and play! Not that we’ll paint the town red and get home at dawn but we could if we wanted to and that’s what makes a kid free night so relaxing – there is NO time constraint or responsibility hanging over your head. It’s also great for Pip to hang out with her 3.5 year old cousin Max and to spend time apart from me – a healthy  break from our constant 1-on-1 life. Tomorrow morning I’ll pick her up, we’ll probably both be a bit tired from staying up late but we’ll also be refreshed from having a fun night with loved ones so smiles all round!

What made YOU smile this week?

I love my daily mantra – exercise, eat well and think good things. It is the simplest approach to managing all aspects of health and well-being and has served me extremely well since I pledged to live by it all those years ago.

I especially love the third part of the mantra, ‘think good things’ and whilst I’m pretty darn good at it these days I was completely hopeless at when I was a 92 kilo whingeing pessimist.

The best part is that the transition from ‘thinking bad things’ to ‘thinking good things’ was a cinch, it just took time …and commitment. The commitment was to change the way I thought about myself and my life and, at times it really was a challenge. Some of the negative beliefs I held were so deeply ingrained it required extreme focus and dicipline just to elicit the ‘thought of possibility’ but once that happened the door flung wide open and it became easier and easier to ‘think good things’. It ’s all about minding your language, I’m not referring to the use of profanatites but to the language you use in your head to navigate your way through the tricky parts of daily life. Let me give you some examples:-

Negative thought: I’d love to give up my office job and become a carpenter but I’m too old to start an apprenticeship let alone the fact that I’m female.
Positive thought: I’d love to give up my office job and become a carpenter…it’s definitely worth investigating. I’ll just google carpenters in my areas so I can find out what it would take for me to do that.  

Negative thought: There’s no way I can go to that party/event – I’m way to fat and probably won’t know many people anyway.
Positive thought:  I’d really like to go to that party/event, it will be a good opportunity to catch up with a few people which always lifts my spirits. I’ll ask ‘friend’ to come with me.

Negative thought: Everyone else seems to be able to find love but me. Maybe I’m just not that appealing as a potential partner.
Positive thought:  It’s so inspiring to see other people find love and one day, when I least expect it  I will too.  Between now and then I’m going to make the most of my time as a single entity and do things which stimulate and empower me. 

Negative thought: I’ll never have the money to go on a holiday like that.
Positive thought: I’d love to go on a holiday like that. I’m going to ring a travel agent and find out what it will cost and start a plan to make it happen.

Negative thought: I’m feeling depressed today, I just want to stay home and watch movies. (& eat, drink, smoke etc)
Positive thought: I’m feeling a bit flat today, I think I’ll ring “friend’ and see if she’s free to meet me for a walk and may be a bite to eat afterwards.

THM: (take home message):  Challenge every negative thought with a postive one. Only you can do this. Every thought has the power to make you feel good or bad and it is entirely up to you to make a difference. 

  Have a super smiley week!

1. Pippa went back to school.
Don’t get me wrong, I love her and I loved our holiday time together but 2 weeks of 24/7 with a highly curious 6.5 year old is plenty long enough! It’s good for us both that school has resumed.

2. Started Facebook
After countless ‘friend invites’ to which I always replied ”thanks but I don’t do FB” I found myself having to sign up to be able to view a photo taken of Bobby and I kayaking in Byron Bay. Once ‘in the book’ I instantly saw value because it has connected me with a heap of old friends. Never judge a book by it’s cover right!

3. Returning to work
As much as loved my holiday in Byron Bay and dream of living there some day it’s been lovely to get back to work and be reminded of why I do what I do. It’s also been lovely hearing from our members how they missed me taking their workouts and from my Smiler subscribers saying they have missed my posts. I feel valued and that makes me smile.

4. Pippa enjoyed her tennis lesson
Pip was feeling unsure about starting tennis lessons with a group of girls from school. She’s been haaving private lessons up until now and was telling me she didn’t want to do the group thing. I told her she had to try it for a term and if she wasn’t happy she could stop. She loved it and that made me smile because I want her to keep learning so she and I can play together for the rest of our lives!

5. The lady at the tax office let me off a fine
For some reason we were late paying our quarterly tax bill and had incurred a fine of $550. I had a cheerful talk with the tax lady and she kindly reversed the charge. Just goes to show that sometimes things do swing the right way when you’re smiling down the phone at someone. 

6. I got a ‘lunge bum’ 
It’s not what you think, whatever it is you’re thinking. I’m talking about the muscles in my bum being sore from a workout I did on Monday. I haven’t had a workout for a couple of weeks and it’s feels good to back in to it. I did lots of lunges as well as upper body stuff, abs and cardio and boy can I feel it. Did another workout yesterday and today I feel a million bucks. Exercise always makes me smile.

7. Mangoes 
Mangoes are in season so I bought 2 and ate them. Divine!

Have a great weekend and keep your mind on the mantra – exercise, eat well, think good things.

Smiler

Life is tricky sometimes.
Just is.
For everybody.
For different reasons at different times.

How flexible are you?

Are you flexible enough to touch your toes?

Are you flexible enough to adapt when plans change?

Are you flexible enough to peel your spine up like a cobra?

Are you flexible enough to accept someone elses opinion or ideas?

Are you flexible enough to ‘make do’ when your usual preferences are unavailable?

Are you flexible enough to try a new activity and THEN form an opinion?

Are you flexible enough to bend your arm around your back & touch your shoulder blades?

Are you flexible enough to manage the inevitable changes life brings?

Hopefully by answering these questions you will realise that flexibility is an extremely valuable thing to work on – physically & mentally.

Stay flexible: exercise, eat well and think good things!

Love,

Smiler